Picking Up The Phone!?

June 25, 2015 7:25 pm






The picture of this anvil is what the phone felt like to me in early sobriety.

How many of you can relate?


The suggestion:  Pick up the phone and ask for help!  Early on, for me, it was for help to not drink….  As my recovery time has progressed this concept spread into other areas..  PICK UP THE PHONE to say ‘Hi’, to communicate so things do not get lost in translation via text or emails, to accomplish projects/goals, and to ask for help…  Some might say that talking on the phone is becoming a lost art and that people are not doing it anymore…..

I am guilty of NOT picking up the phone.  I revert to the “easier, softer” less personal way of communicating.  Texting is my FAVORITE!  I would much rather isolate in my home office from family, friends, co-workers and other responsibilities only communicating electronically – text and email.  Some days, my 4.55 ounce iPhone is just too heavy to pick up!!!


The most recent example in my life that got me thinking about picking up the phone happened this week.  I have been communicating,  via email for 1.5 years, with the Department of Health and Human Services trying to get reciprocity in my current State of residence for my California issued Mental Health License with minimal progress and lots of frustration.


Due to my frustration, I finally wrote a fiery email to the woman I have been communicating with.  Before hitting send, I paused, prayed, and then PICKED UP THE PHONE to chat with her live…  WHAT A CONCEPT!!!  Confusion was put to rest and I was offered solutions to roadblocks I had been coming into contact with….   It will still take some time to get the reciprocity, and it may not even work, but at least now I have a solution and feel some hope!

LESSON:  A phone call with the right tone and humility gets much more results than emotionally charged emails or texts….

Most of all I am reminded to pick up that hundred pound phone!!!!

heavy phone



June 19, 2015 11:12 am





Renting space in my head for free…..

Have you ever heard that expression before?  I said it to a couple of my “Normie” friends the other day and they thought it was GENIUS!

brain rent

What is really happening when I let someone rent space in my head for free is I AM THE ONE getting hurt, over and over again due to a resentment that I am holding on to…  The person occupying space in my brain has no idea that I am ruminating on the event – usually both when I am awake and when I am sleeping – nor are they even thinking about it…

This PAST event wreaks havoc in my present and future for an undetermined amount of time…

rent bill

Now what to do to get over this rent free living.  I have tried praying for the person, discussing with my husband, going to meetings, exercising…  NOTHING works.    Sometimes I just need to surrender by stepping back, taking a deep breath and trying to let go.  This is a process…  Done MANY times.


The most recent incident where someone was living rent free in my brain lasted for about a week.  After I was finally able to surrender and let go I saw this person.  I was able to be kind, loving, tolerant and initiated a conversation with her.  Here is the shocker:  SHE apologized to ME for her behavior that I had been fixated on for DAYS!  Amazing how things work when I just let go…..

Let God

Bryan Mc.

June 11, 2015 6:30 pm




In honor of his recent 10 year anniversary with Beacon HouseSM this week’s blog is dedicated to Bryan McAlister.

There is a lot I could say about Bryan….All the way from being an avid collector of EVERYTHING, knowing EVERYONE on the Monterey Peninsula, being one of the most inquisitive people I know, and that he is one of a kind.

Fun Fact about Bryan:  One of his greatest joys is fishing!!!  This is a picture of Bryan from 40 years ago!  This fish that was given to him by on old commercial fisherman…  BUT he of course told his family that HE caught it!!!!

This is our current Bryan catching his own fish!

bryan older

Bryan is an amazing nurse, the best room searcher I know, and a great friend!  He is multi-talented.  To read more about Bryan please check-out his bio at:

Thank you for your friendship and dedication to helping save countless lives over these past 10-years!


June 3, 2015 12:36 pm






Change is inevitable.

I was told to not make any major changes in my first year sobriety…..  I followed this suggestion.  Actually, I don’t think I made any major changes in until my 10th year of recovery…..  Things pretty much remained the same – meetings, prayer, exercise, family, friends, work repeat.

Change has been recent for me and the changes have been BIG for a girl who likes status quo. In the past two+ years I have fallen in love, gotten engaged, married, and moved from small, safe, comfortable Pacific Grove to the mid-west.


Bought a house, got a puppy, and much MUCH more!   These changes have been good – I have survived and actually thrived!


This morning, however, I went grocery shopping and they REARRANGED THE WHOLE STORE!!!!  There is nothing like moving the cereal that can throw this alcoholic into a panic!

I am grateful that I am now able to ‘change’ that potential crisis into an adventure!  It took a moment, but I found the cereal and had fun searching!

    One thing that never changes wherever I go is our fellowship.

The fellowship and my Higher Power remain constant.